I was away for a day to my cousin's house in Kent (pronounced "Kent") and purposefully left my computer and phone behind, hoping I might be left stranded and they would be forced to keep me as the au pair for their adorable 2.5 red headed baby.
Perhaps it is just as well that I am returned to Grandparentland, as the baby's first word was "cheers" and displays dangerous ginger tendencies.
My visit was also marked by an encounter with a dog called Marmite, who fell in love with me. To prove his affection he chewed up my underwear and then insisted on cuddling and drinking my tea. Like the brand Marmite, either you "love it or you hate it." Both?
Sadly stripped of my undergarments, I've since recovered my good spirits by watching Mamma Mia with my grandfather (a stunning duet of "I Have A Dream" echoed through the rafters). I was always rather annoyed that they didn't put in my favorite ABBA tune, "On and On and On." Such a good message from that song.
"Father can you tell me what is right and and what is wrong?
He said keep a rockin' baby till the night is gone...on and on and on!"
However, it is (as my wise grandfather puts it) "The Ultimate Feel Good Film." Men in flippers, skinny dippers, and James Bond.
I do have a new favorite TV show, the stand-up comedy of "Mock The Week." Six stand up comedians are expected to respond with lightning speed to various acronyms, numbers, quotes and pictures. No one was spared the wicked wrath, not pompous politicians publishing their bore-all memoirs, nor the prostitute who maintained her class by not sleeping with Wayne Rooney INSIDE the house with his wife in it. You keep that standard high, girl. I giggled particularly about a rant on the subject of school.
"I spent half my time in school worrying about frrractions. And by half I mean..."
"My teacher asked me one day if I could take the guinea pig home. Six months later, starving, having worn through my trainers I arrived in the African Republic of Guinea."
On the menu for tomorrow: making the ultimate sacrifice by learning how to use twitter in order to explain it to my grandfather.
#Anysuggestions?
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