The best quote so far came from breakfast today. My Granny Peppa, the usual font of wisdom and sass, came out with this one.
"People who fight over the little things tend to agree on the big ones."
This is essentially my relationship with my entire family. We squabble, whine, bicker and argue, but when it really gets down to it, we are of one mind. The same is with Granny and her beloved Grunkle. I've never heard an argument over when to change the water in the flower pots for a half an hour before. Or a seriously heated discussion over how one ought to attend to the toaster whilst it does its business. But I learn things everyday, mainly..
a) do not mess with Grunkle's vegetable garden
b) chlorine turning one's hair green isn't a good excuse for not swimming in the pool.
c) Lifting anything will give me back problems.
d) do not hit croquet balls off the croquet lawn and into the veg garden.
Today we visited the fairy rock, which was surrounded by ominous messages in French about how if you vandalize the place, the fairies will get you. We saw no vandalism. Or vandalisers for that matter.
My family left me today, gone back to the United States. Our first motion passed (my Grandparents and I) was to convene over a lunch of cake, ice cream and orange juice. When Grunkle complained about the lack of veggies, he was told sternly to "take what you've got and be grateful." Quite right.
As Granny says, Grunkle is completely bone from the neck up (not) and is "just arm candy and great for carrying things" (and gardening).
Speaking of not so stupid people, I've found it very amusing when people disagree or tell me to do things I don't want to, to pull out the old trick of "I don't speak any french... I'm just an American visitor." Grunkle tried this in the US when getting out of a parking ticket. Unfortunately the cop started speaking fluent french back to him. NICE TRY!
Grunkle is now complaining about how his weekly "soft porn" magazine of Madame Figaro (it's no more pornographic than most things in French advertising, which is to say VERY) is "going downhill. It's just a bunch of bloody children." He forgot to read the cover and see that it is the annual kid's issue.
Earlier today as I was about to leave for work at the Taste of Happiness, I left my elders admiring my collection of 70s male fashion post cards, a packet of "mail order hunks" with the most ridiculous and innuendo'd gentleman ever to deface a scrap of paper.
Work today was GREAT! I got to stick together macaroons, eat all the broken ones and was introduced to everyone as the "young American visiting us." Which led to questions of "do you know so-and-so?" Um, well the US does have quite of few people... Unfortunately I don't think we've met.
Fashion Statement of the day: Couple walked in wearing matching leather fedoras.
No comments:
Post a Comment