A Most Dangerous Moat

Our chateau has a moat. It also has a boat that goes along with this moat, and to get to the boat in order to paddle the moat one must hop a fence.

Suggestion: Don't try this in skirts/dresses/sandals.

The moat turned out to be six inches deep (take that invaders!) and full of the worlds most aggressive frogs. I croaked my way down the river and way followed by an armanda of amphibians. Nearly fell in, hopped the fence (flashed the Italians next door... wait, you didn't know we had Italian neighbors at the Chateau de C____? Neither did we) and went in to read a book.

After endless games of cards we went to Port En Bessin, which means "Port in a Basin" for lunch and some beachy fun. Lunch was TASTY, and I made ten euros by eating some fish eyes. Videos may follow. An excellent way to pay for one's gap year, in my opinion.

Also bought a snancy new sweatshirt with sailor stripes, spied some more RVs and saved a man's jacket from being run over. Positively saintlike behavior.

At the beach we arrived as the tide was coming in and after getting nice and soaked, we buried Shporty and made him into the shape of a turtle. The incapacitated little brother proceeded to wail every time sand came in his mouth, so we put a towel on his face. A solution we will use again in the future.

Amusing story...

An irishman who ran one of London's biggest "entertainment" houses taught his dog this..

Irishman: What do leetle gurls doo forr diamondss?

(dog rolls on it's back and wags its legs in the air.)

Janda was banished to the Sin Bin last night and was berated today for his cacophonous snoring. He has a twitchy leg in his sleep and so offered to go sleep then in the car... Wonder what the Italians would think of the grunting and leg flailing coming from the car?

Rigor Amortis.

The British Are Coming!

Today I walked by the graves of 9,000 people. Soldiers, mostly, and a few nurses (including the one from Saving Private Ryan, who died not in combat but after, in a plane crash. She was a BABE.)

We visited the American and French Memorials for the D-Day landings, with a Romanian tour guide called Corina (WONDERFUL job, you should reward her for being so awesome if you're reading this, French Memorial Foundation).

Very humbling and sad, to think that people my age and younger (the youngest who died fighting was 14) lost their lives so tragically. Also, I was shocked to hear that 2,000 civilians died... just in one city, Caen. We only talk about the joy of being liberated from the Nazis, but many people lost their lives before they could be "liberated." And so much battle and carnage... Instead of going on a gap year or going to college, my friends and I could've been going off to war.

In the War Museum there was a record playing of the Andrews Sisters. New favorite band. "Rum and coooo-CAH! Cola."

Most exciting news of the day was seeing a tattoo parlor that offered "bijoux dents." Yes, even in a randy city in Normandy you can get Grillz.

Also, Caen has some very talented graffiti artists. Most of the french graffiti I've seen has been BORING, just tags or initials. No, you vandalizers, it doesn't make you cool. But this stuff is CLASSY and awesome. Keep at it!

Life On The Sin Bin

We have now taken refuge in a chateau in Normandy, Chateau de C_____ to be precise. It is 4 km away from the Graveyard featured so dramatically in "Saving Private Ryan." I didn't see SPR, as often times Scooby Doo is too violent for me, but I'm told it is "Epic" and "Gory." Not my French cup of tea.

It (this chateau) has a moat, a boat, and the addition of two brand spanking new grandparents who have arrived with all their british accents, sass, much better swear words and general outlook on life.

In a nutshell-
"If it is serious, let's poke fun."

Some quotes from today include--->

Doubleoseven- Dad, do you want red or white with lunch?
Janda- Yes.

Grann- Are you going to be helpful or not darling?
Janda- I'm going to be helpful. As always.

Grann- Drink it slowly dear, and have it for later.
Janda- Or I could drink it fast and order another.

The Sin Bin is the new name couch my dearest Grandfather "Janda" has taken for his own. He assumed that his hedonistic habits would result in
a) his expulsion from his room with Grann (my English granny).
b) his inability to walk up two flights of windy, uneven cobblestone steps.

Played cards with doubleoseven, Janda and for a little bit, Shporty. Score (in games won).
Marf- 5
Doubleo- 4
Janda- 0
Shporty- 0

Janda then grumped and said "I'm now going to go to bed in a sulk."
Grann's repartee- "Why change a lifelong habit now?"

I love my Grandparents.